To Each Thier Own

So here I am feeling the need to express my discontent for the people who judge others and still call themselves Christians. I personally am a cross between a Zen Buddhist and a Christian. You ask how that is possible and I will tell you how.

Before I joined the military I was raised as a Pentecostal, I was firm in my belief and the teachings of the ministry and at one point I even wanted to be a minister, but then one day there was a fateful mistep for me, I was accused of something for which I had nothing to do with, I will spare everyone the detail for the they are inconsequential, the outcome of the situation however was every bit consequential for me, I was stripped of all my rights to be a part of the youth group, I was banned and shunned with in my own friends. I left the church for a while, had my wild times and then found harmony in church once again somewhere else. But a friend of mine called me up and told me that the person who had accused me of that issue had been caught bragging about it and was made to apologize to the entire congregation, you know the funny thing is though, I never received that apology from that person. Such as life those that are accused and found not guilty will never receive the apology even though they have been found innocent.

So needless to say when I first joined the service I still had my faith in the religion, that is until the day that I was on my first deployment and saw things that will never leave my mind for as long as I live. Needless to say when I came back my brain was scrambled I couldn't get a handle on what I had saw and done and it left me lost. I went to talk with the minister of my church and instead of listening to what I was feeling and trying to help me, instead he opted to preach at me for my mistakes and wrong doings, I'm sorry folks but that doesn't work for me.

So now we enter back into the realm of Buddhism, after I left my unit I transfered over to Korea, where I began to study and meditate at the temple there, I never forgot that God is real so don't get your panties in a bunch however I did start to find peace within myself. Change does not happen over night it takes time, time of reflection and understanding of your mind your heart and soul. But it was a start, it was a start that I am still on, trying to find myself in this messed up world that we live in.